[Image from wvmountaintop.wordpress.com]Will God help Tim pull it out again?
We put that question to our heavenly reporter, LuLu (that may be her in the photo with Tebow?).
"I've just returned from heaven," said LuLu, breathlessly and breastfully (it's a long trip!). "Word is that just yesterday in the main throne room, Jesus was talking with the Father and the Holy Ghost who are, in fact, the same person as he is, and the Father told himself in the form of Jesus to ask the angel, Gabriel, to get St. Philip.
"What was so thrilling," trilled LuLu, "was that the three-in-one were talking about our national college football championships. I had to run to the bathroom to pee twice!
"Well, seconds later, Gabe and Philip arrived and Jesus asked what the heck he really meant in Chapter 4, verse 13 of his little book."
"I didn't write that!" Philip told Jesus indignantly.
"Well, who did, then? It's got your name on it!" responded Jesus.
"Oh, please, you must remember. It's one of St. Paul's seven authentic letters. It was written to those chosen few and converts in Philippi!"
"Oops!" said the Father, laughing.
"Ho, ho, ho" said the Holy Ghost, rolling on the golden floor.
"Well," said LuLu, "Jesus was a little miffed that he'd forgotten Paul had written the Letter to the Philippians. He sort of stormed out of the throne room and slammed the door which knocked poor Philip on his behind.
"But a few minutes later, Jesus came back in with St. Paul trailing behind, mumbling about how he never gets credit for anything.
"I missed part of the conversation after that, but here's what I remember."
"Who in heaven is Tim Tebow?" asked St. Paul.
The Holy Ghost chuckled. "He's not in heaven yet, Pablo." (The HG always teased St. Paul by using his Spanish name.)
"He's the quarterback this year for the University of Florida," said Jesus.
"Oh, for My sake," said the Father. "Is he still writing the silly verse on his face thinking we care?"
"Oh, that Tim Tebow," said St. Paul. "Well, I think it's pretty great and indicates he's a true follower of you guys."
"You're just saying that 'cause you wrote the verse," said Jesus. "But, you know what, you didn't check with me before your put pen to paper! Did I ever say you could do "all things" through me? Huh?"
"Hmm. No," said St. Paul. "But I figured you'd approve."
"That's the trouble with you, Paul or Saul or whatever you're calling yourself now. You make too many assumptions."
"Ok," said the Father. "Enough, already, with all this foolishness. We've got work to do today and we're way behind as it is. What do we do about Tebow and his scripture facial?"
"Well," sighed the Holy Ghost. "What's Oklahoma done for us lately? Do any of their players write bible verses on their faces? Seems like an open and shut case to me."
"I agree," said Jesus. "He might have picked a better verse, though. Philippians 4:13 makes it sound like I'm going to be throwing the football for him, but what the hey, let's give it to him."
"I would be honored. Again." said St. Paul.
"What if Oklahoma wins?" asked the Father. "We'd look kind of stupid. Well, maybe Tebow would look stupid. Should we break the Oklahoma quarterback's leg in practice?"
"Whoa," said the Holy Ghost, rising abruptly and smoothing his robe while brushing his hair back with upturned hand. "That would be really cheating. It's one thing to give Tebow a little bump, but wow, what you're suggesting, not even I can go along with that!"
"And that about's it," said LuLu. "God the Father stood up, which meant, of course, that God the Son and God the Holy Ghost also stood up. Then they left the room to get some lunch. As they walked out, arm in arm, St. Paul tagging behind but smiling now, God the Father said:
"Okay, are I in agreement now? Tebow wins?"
"Yup!" He said in unison.
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