Going Gestapo Over Droopy Pants in Florida

[Photo is from the blog, BlackGivesBack]

One of the most difficult and terrifying problems facing the Florida state legislature these days is droopy pants!

Slip-sliding down the hips, the pants call to mind how Florida's economy is in the toilet and how Florida's school children are having a hard time evolving.

Never fear, however, as Florida's senators, taking a page from the Gestapo, have called for an end to this disgraceful and morally-abject behavior.

Believing that if one law is good for a state, then a million laws regulating a million modules of behavior, must be a million times better, Florida's senators have moved in that direction by outlawing droopy pants!

Now, you'd naturally assume that the author of this saggy, baggy legislation, would be a Republican. You'd be wrong. He's a simple-minded Democrat, by name of Gary Siplin, from Orlando. Maybe it's the Orlando connection - that's rapidly becoming the saggiest, baggiest city in Florida!

What Siplin objects to is the fact that the baggy pants fad derived from "rap artists after first appearing among prison inmates as a signal they were looking for sex." And he thinks it is his job to force Florida's kids to look good as it will "help students get jobs and a degree."

Is that part of the job description for a Florida senator?

Some cities in Florida, such as Riveria Beach, already have a baggy pants law. Repeat offenders who insist on showing off their buttocks can go to jail for 60 days!

Wonder what simple Siplin and his Gestapo mind will come up with next?

I think they should pass a law that would forbid girls from tattooing their stomachs. That's so distracting at the beach! Plus they might not be able to get a job as a lifeguard - especially at a Disney resort!

[I do think these drooping pants are truly idiotic and stupid. I don't think we need to outlaw them. Droopy pants were a fad in 1948. I know; my Levis drooped, too.]