So what's next? What terrible calamity is coming next? I mean, God went after those non-believing no-good Haitians with a devastating earthquake to punish them for their terrible sins, such as refusing to be good slaves!
Now, God has hit Chile! So what did Chile do that was so bad? Oh, yeah, they got rid of their terrorist leader and are trying to be a good, decent country.
Not only so, but God caused panic throughout a large part of the world by threatening Hawaii and Japan and lots of other degenerate places that don't care about Jesus with a tsunami!
But the worst is yet to come! God is so damn angry with the United States for not putting him in its Constitution, and not teaching about Jesus in the public schools and not putting his ten commands in the courthouses, and allowing so many abortions and in some cases, authorizing gays to get married, and worst of all, electing a Marxist as president ... well, I've heard from the grapevine that God may not wait for Armageddon! I've heard he's got another horrible disaster in mind; one that will flay the nation with a terrible punishment (like bedbugs) for years; one from which the United States may never recover...
I've heard that God is considering making Sarah Palin president!
That'll show us!
4 comments:
Yea, that whole rainbow after the great flood was just a ruse to lull us into sinful complacency. It wasn't really a promise--
Let me guess, why is Chile getting it? Because they are Heathen Catholics! That's why! Papists!
I can't wait til they all find out God is female. That part will be the best part of all! And Black. God is a big Black Woman like Whoopi Goldberg one funnier and more hormonal!
Hi Seeing Eye Chick!
I used to think God was a female and black, too. Now I think that can't be the case, as god, is he/she exists is simply an evil monster!
Nope the Evil Monster is the Egregore of Apocalyptic Idiots. Just like the Apocalypse takes on a life of it's own, because these dipturds give it a bit of their lives everyday that they fear and desire it's passing.
Long Live Political Atheism! If you have weird thoughts, unverifiable paranormal experiences--Do us all a favor and keep them out of the office and in your pants!
I believe that Jesus hates Chile because you would not leave your penis alone; you sick, twisted, bastard. How could you be so selfish? Well, now you’ve gone too far. You knew God hated your sexuality, but you still had to push it, didn’t you? And pull it. And then push it back again. Over and over until that liquid guilt landed on that old gym sock. For shame. For shame. Now, all those people are dead and its your fault. Obviously you’ll burn in everlasting hell fire for the lives you claimed. Maybe next time you’ll think before you yank. May God have mercy on your soul.
Don’t you understand? Jesus loves you. Amen.
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