Tuesday, July 26, 2011

The GOP (God's Own Pissants) and the No Religious Test clause

There is, in our Constitution, a clause which says specifically that there shall be no religious test for anyone wishing to hold any public office in the United States of America.  It is found in Article VI and reads thusly:  "...no religious Test shall ever be required as a Qualification to any Office or public Trust under the United States."

Unfortunately, there are many ignoramuses in our nation, and not a few of those ignoramuses belong to the Republican Party.  The so-called tea party faction is comprised of 99.9% ignoramuses.  But worse than ignorance is the increasing tendency among the extreme right (which has successful co-opted the Republican Party and the political discussion in our country) to ignore the clear meaning and intent of the Constitution when it serves their purposes.

Thus, although the Constitution demands that there be no religious test for public office, a religious test has become a litmus test for anyone wishing to be elected to almost any position. There is not a chance in hell that an atheist or agnostic could win any election!

For Republicans, that poses no problem for they do not take the Constitution seriously anyway. In fact, they proudly shout out their religious credentials for they know the religious test is the most important test among a large percentage of American voters. Their god trumps the Constitution every time!

One of the latest to proclaim a calling from God to run for public office (in this case, the presidency) is good ol' Rick Perry, the moronic governor of Texas. Perry's been coy about his ambitions, but it's been obvious for some time he plans to throw his Stetson in the 2012 presidential ring. Just a week or two ago Perry said "he's getting more and more comfortable every day that this is what [he's] been called to do." He is, he said, "... what America needs."

Even for a Texan, that takes a lot of gall. "I am what America needs"? Let us invoke the Lord: Jesus H. Christ! Perry's run the state of Texas into the ground and he thinks he's what America needs?

Here's some of what Perry believes: The graduated income tax was the first step toward socialism; the direct election of U.S. senators was very bad; Social Security and other such programs upon which people depend for their very lives, were the second step toward socialism. Socialism, obviously, is bad, but we have no clue what Perry means by the word!

Perry and his cohorts in the Texas Legislature passed, at the last minute, bills which 1) makes a photo ID necessary to vote; 2) forces a woman contemplating an abortion to have a sonogram; and 3) gives local police the right to enforce national immigration laws.

This wacko governor is also a climate change denier and believes the theory of evolution is false. But there really was an Adam and Eve!

Most importantly, Perry believes that there is a god up there somewhere who can be conned into fixing all that's wrong with the good ol' U.S. All you need to do is pray. "There is hope for America," claims Perry, "It lies in heaven, and we will find it on our knees."

Then there's Michele Bachmann. It's hard to conceive of anyone as stupid and as confused as is this woman. God has called her to run for president, says Bachmann. And this is not the first time she's heard the deity's voice. Back in 2006, she proclaimed she had been in touch with God and after fasting and praying God called her to run for the U.S. House of Representatives.

As Matt Taibbi said in a Rolling Stone article: "Bachmann is a religious zealot whose brain is a raging electrical storm of divine visions and paranoid delusions. She believes that the Chinese are plotting to replace the dollar bill, that light bulbs are killing our dogs and cats, and that God personally chose her to become both an IRS attorney who would spend years hounding taxpayers and a raging anti-tax Tea Party crusader against big government."

Bachmann's old friend and ex-governor of Minnesota (now not such a friend), Tim Pawlenty, is also running for president on God's say-so. The mythical Jesus H. Christ is Tim's "political hero." And God is "going to lead the way every day."

Let us not forget Herman Cain. Stop laughing! Cain is a pizza mogul. He's also a black man. Somehow he has forgotten the fact that a black man running as a Republican has about as much chance getting elected as Karl Marx!

Nevertheless, Cain last April, said God wants him to be president. In fact, God cured him of cancer so he could run president. Yes sir. Now ain't that somethin'?

Although it may appear that God has deserted dear Sarah Palin from Arizona (formerly of Alaska), that is not the case. I remember when a cult bishop from Africa laid his hands on Sarah which meant that in the world of goofy Pentecostalism, she had been designated God's choice for the Oval Office. And that designation has never been rescinded. Unless Sarah gets a last-minute notice from the deity, she's also gonna be running around claiming God wants Obama out, out, out and her in, in, in!

There are others contestants, too, who would have us believe that God is backing their plans to ruin the country. Newt Gingrich is one, but old Newt doesn't have much of a chance these days even though he says he's given up philandering and joined the Roman Catholic Church and become a right-wing zealot with no clear idea as to what the hell he believes. Gingrich is an afterthought, a flicker off in the distance getting smaller and smaller with each passing day.

Rick Santorum is another and is a fool, but a fool with a small following. Santorum actually looks as stupid as he is. And every time he opens his mouth, he proves it. The American left, says Santorum, hates Christians and the Christian church. Not only so, but he's talking to God and he's running in 2012 because he wants to defend "God's truth in the world," because God told him to do so! Notice, this pissant actually says, in public, that he intends to violate his oath of office which requires him to defend, not God, but the U.S. Constitution.

There are two other folks running for president in 2012. They come last 'cause they are both Mormons - members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. They are Jon Huntsman and Mitt Romney. Now, if you know anything about the beliefs of the Mormon religion, you know that anyone who actually believes that nonsense should be automatically disqualified for the presidency. The whole schema of Mormonism is even more bizarre than normal Christianity; it is completely irrational and unjustifiable. And even though Huntsman and Romney can claim to be Christians 'til the cows come home, the great majority of "evangelicals" won't believe them! Mormons are NOT Christians so far as most Christians are concerned!

So, ultimately, the religious test which should not apply, will sink both of their campaigns. I think. It's hard to know with the religious right, though, 'cause they are noted for changing their beliefs at a moment's notice if such change helps them meet their goals. The end almost always justifies the means for the religious right wing zealots.

Not so long ago the United States was finally rid of an ignorant Texas clown who claimed he spoke with God and was told that God not only wanted him to be president but to wage war on a country in order to obtain it's oil for his rich friends. Well, he didn't actually say that. At first he said the unprovoked invasion of Iraq was to take away Saddam's bad war toys - WMDs. But he lied. He knew Saddam didn't have any WMDs. So then he said it was to make Iraq free. That was a lie, too. It had to do with oil.

We don't need another such clown talking to his/her god whose "call" always seems to justify whatever it is the clown wants to do at the moment.

Our Congress is filled with additional clowns who believe in Jesus and God and the Holy Ghost but can't find it in their hearts to cooperate with others for the good of the country and who love to wage war all over the world because God, they believe, wants us to spread our peace and freedom to all peoples even if it kills them!

In spite of what the Constitution says, it is obvious we do have a religious test for political office. But maybe we can turn that around. Perhaps we could establish the following process:  Any candidate for political office who claims to speak with God or hear God speaking to him or her is automatically disqualified on the grounds of suspicion of insanity. Said person is then to be wrapped tightly in a white jacket and put in a rubber room until the election is over.

Thanks to Atheist Cartoons for the cartoons!


Ken said...

If all of the GOPers are saying God told them to run, then is there not a simple implication that several of them are lying? If God has chosen someone, then that person is the chosen one. Somehow I do not envision God hedging his/her bets by asking several GOPers to run....

doug.glassman said...

@ Ken: Maybe God did tell all of them, and he's just trolling us.

Phoenix Justice said...


They are all lying. Period. The God I learned about in Sunday school wasn't a God who meddled in the affairs of men. He didn't anoint kings, queens or GOP presidential hopefuls.

That being said, the GOP needs a refresher course on the Constitution. Not that they will listen.

Distributorcap said...

if i was God, i would high tail it off the planet earth and find a place with more normal and rational beings

the us congress, with their enablers called the us media - have not only put this country at risk in the name of god - but their entire globe

ig god created people like michele bachmann - they god needs to see a shrink very faset

Wild Clover said...

I just proposed to the others in the room that God chose each of them to run so that we the people could look upon this mass of wingnuttery laid bare and choose to go with candidates who walk the walk, rather than bloviate about their anointment from the heavens. The sane among the non-religious in the main act more upon "Christian" principles than the loud mouth professional christians, and the folks who actually take the words of Christ seriously don't pray loudly upon street corners, feed and help the poor, and act as good stewards of the world they believe God has made. So if God exists, I can see Him telling all these whited sepulchers to run...as far as I know, He didn't tell anyone they were the anointed winner, just they should run...and show us all what false prophets and hypocrites look like.
The other explanation would be some kind of psychosis affecting hypocrites and fools...not sure what the vector of contagion would be.

Anonymous said...

Well if you do not count 500 tons of yellow cake, alumni tubes , the firing devices for atomnic bombs and anthrax that was found in Iraq would say that there were no WMDs.

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